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Believe in your parenting skills but never stop improving

It was the morning of Eid or what we Malays here call Hari Raya Aidilfitri.  The usual practice is that we would ask for forgiveness from each other, with the younger ones asking for forgiveness from the older ones first. So what happened was that as usual I would start asking for forgiveness from my husband first and then followed by the kids after which they will ask for forgiveness from myself and then from each other. Normally this goes by age with which the youngest will ask for forgiveness from the older ones.  The eldest started with acknowledging his mistakes and then asking to be forgiven with a promise of wanting to try to change his ways. This is followed by the second one and then the third one. 

Even the hard-hearted ones can actually be soft

The third one turns thirteen this year. He’s always been the quietest and the most quick-tempered yet the most disciplined of them all. Turning thirteen, going to a new school which is far from home and added subjects has taken a toll on him and it doesn’t help that he’s quite a perfectionist. He leaves home by 6am every morning and would only be back by 4pm daily, sometimes later. Being the disciplined one, not only is he on top of his schoolwork, he is also competitive in his co-curricular activity. This includes leaving the house as early as 6.30am on Saturdays to continue with his own training. As such, his temper has gotten the better of him such that he has lost his temper on me many a times just because I asked him to get some housework done.   Yet….. the moment he starts to ask for forgiveness from me, he started tearing. I straight away pulled him close, hugged him and assured him that all is ok; that I understood the challenges that he’s going through. I adviced him to manage accordingly and rest when needed but also watch his temper. Even the hardest kids break down at times.


Before we left to visit my in laws, my second one presented her sister and I a set of pearl jewelry; matching earrings, bracelet and necklace to our outfit that day. My heart melted cos things has been frustrating with her in the past week. It felt like all the work we did in the couple of months seem to go down the drain. She was in low moods for the most part of the last fortnight, but that gesture seems to make me forget that it ever happened.  We all have our hard times in raising our children, and a lot of times we thought we have failed, but believe in your parenting skills just don’t stop improving.

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